Caught in the act eps 5
It was my younger brother, he held my leg in one tiny hand and the other held a chocolate substance to his mouth. I smiled at him and lifted him up in the air. I looked at the spot he held my trouser, it was smeared with the chocolate substance. "Even forgiveness is freely given", I smiled at him. He grinned as though he understood what I said. My mother can't be far, I looked ahead to see her discussing with someone, occasionally looking in our direction. Thank God for the wisdom she displayed, I sighed.
The ride home was better than the ride to church. I was comfortable in my skin again. Alone in my room, I ruminated on the things Pastor Emmanuel said. He talked about how the world is waiting for the sons. God is also waiting for His sons to become mature. Such that we leave the level of struggling with sin that easily beset us to the level of getting the news of His grace and power, the kingdom to come known to all and sundry. And all the way, He is cheering us on and helping us. The growth can only come through the knowledge of Him and who we are in Him. I talked to God about how I was sorry about the things I did, I needed His help to get back on track, the words I said in prayer felt different. Ignorance was gone, true knowledge had dawned. I remembered Pastor Emmanuel's prayer and I felt a calm wash over me.
He said "Father, I thank you for Ayo. I thank you that nothing he does could ever surprise you for you have foreknown him and predestined him to be conformed to your image. Thank you for justifying him by your Son. You did not spare your son, how much more you would give Ayo all things freely with Him. There is no condemnation for Ayo, because the Son died and is at the right hand making intercession for him. Who then can condemn him? When the Father has justified him and the Son intercedes for him. Father, I ask that your love rings louder in the heart of Ayo. For nothing can separate us from your love which we have in Christ. I ask that you expose the accuser for who he truly is, a liar and accuser. You are not condemning us at anytime. You are for us at all times. I ask that you grant Ayo the grace to approach your throne in his time of needs, that he would be persuaded of your love for him. For while he was yet your enemy you died for him, how much more now he is reconciled to you will you save him. We know all things work together for our good, heavenly Father use this experience to your glory that that which the enemy meant for evil might speak of your power to transform lives, amen."
How long until I understand like he does? I will start by reading the word and communing with my Father.
The next time the urge came, I told myself I was righteous. I affirmed who the bible told me I was. Some days I took the extra step of not being alone when the urge was strong. But one thing I never did, was to doubt that I have been made righteous. I never got tired of talking to God about it and I found encouragement in the word and my mum who became my closest friend. Even Pastor Emmanuel. With time, I realized I had not been thinking about it. I was too focused getting to know God better to dwell on my shortcomings. I ignored the voices as well. When I remembered, there was no urge.
And we lived happily ever after. Did I just type that? Scratch that. I mean that by patient continuance I am seeking for glory, honor, immortality and eternal life. That is what Christ wants for me, to be more than a nominal Christian. This present depriving myself does not compare what I would get. As long as I am here on earth, the journey does not end. No need to get scared though, armed with the knowledge God loves me and He has promised to keep me and the understanding of all that He is to me, I know I can make it. That is the good fight of faith, not so? And fighting, I shall.
The end.
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